"Has anything you have ever done made your life better?"
Monday
6:00 P.M.
The roads are busy as always..Old Man Vimmi's, Ice Cream Parlour is starting to get it's late evening customers. Even though I am standing far away from the road, I can see the flying dust particles everywhere. The cars, rickshaws, autos, and cycles' noises fall into the ears like bullets..This is India baby! The pollution covered sunset is a sight to kill and die for. Alright, finished with my cigarette. I drop the finished, unlit piece on the floor, squish it with my foot and say, 'Hasta La Vista Baby!' There are many things on the roads, the pavement, and even under my feet..It won't create a difference. Never has..Never will. My eyes, close for a minute...God Help Me..There has been an accident in front of my eyes..The driver covered in blood is crawling out of the car..No sign of movement from the second car. What do I do? Should I go out there and help the passengers. But, other people are also staring. Nobody is moving one inch..It would not create a difference even if I get involved..Besides, God forgives one sin..Let this be it.
Tuesday
9:30 A.M.
My head is still roaming around yesterday's incident. Depositing some money into my bank account might give me some relief. It is crowdy as usual. Long lines are forming around different windows. So, hot in here. Did someone steal your, A.C. or something? It feels good, when you are actually not saying something, just thinking it in your head. Try that, it actually feels good! Feels like you are in, front of a Police Officer, kick him, poke him, he wouldn't mind. Take all your anger off on the Police. Mumbai for me, and I don't know about you. Who am I talking to anyway? All this heat is travelling into my head.
"Put your hands up! This is a robbery. Everybody on the floor."
What the heck? Everybody is starting to put their hands in the air, and lying on the floor. I should do the same thing....Something is touching my head. I am starting to hear a loud voice over my head.
"I don't want any cleverness, or this man's brain will be blown out of his head."
I am a hostage. This man seems serious. He can blow my brain out of my head. I can hear my heart beat. It is very fast. I should try to do something..No, I should stay perfectly still. Why does not anyone do something? He is making me move. All I can see is the people lying on the floor. He is taking me away. What if he takes me outside the bank and shoots me? One bullet, and my body will be lying on the road. The gun is still on my head! I can feel the sweatiness all over my head. My head is feeling light suddenly. I gather my courage and turn around....The robbers are gone. Thank you, God.
12:00 P.M.
Midnight
Should I call myself lucky? Or, was it just a coincidence? He could have had shot me right away. The man had probably seen a lot of blood. Mine was not different. If he had shot me..Who would have had took me to my grave? I don't know a single person in my area. If my story gets a full stop, no editor is going to publish it..I know no one. I need a glass of Bacardi. On the rocks. I am done making my drink. Take a sip. Feels nice, strong. Most people say, 'Life is like a box of chocolates, you don't know what is going to come next.' Bullshit! Crime, Corruption, Rape, Robbery, Kidnapping. I find this in every corner of this country. Find it at every turn. Nobody takes responsibilty to clean it. Nobody gives a damn about others. I didn't. I was wrong. This is going to be changed. I will change it.
The plug is in the wire. I am turning the computer on. My target....Hacking the Police website. Hacking is pretty easy, if you work for a Computer Software Company, or if you are a Computer Engineer. Or, maybe I am just too drunk!
Wednesday
3:00 P.M.
I am on the location, I printed from the computer yesterday. It is the area of, Drug Lord A.J. Short for, Aditya Jhand. Supplies drugs to everybody in the whole state. From college students to peons to roadside vendors. I walk in the back alley. There is a little window. I kick the window. Still intact! One more kick. Not breaking. Windows also open. I open the window and jump on the floor. There is a faint smell of drugs in the air. I don't know whether it is cocaine, or heroine, or a mixture of several drugs. I have a knife..That's it. I am hiding behind a big drum. All I can see is some men, packaging some packets into big boxes. Looks like they hit a jackpot today........Something has hit me..My brain is falling into darkness.
A.J. - Who are you? What do you want? Why are you here?
Why are you doing this? Don't you believe in respect!
A. J. - I believe in death, destruction, chaos, filth and greed.
"Kill Him!"
He is walking away! The cries of alligator coming from his shoes....The goons are gathering around me. I am tied up. Can't move. Wait, they are bringing some sort of bottle. It has something in it. They are pouring it on my hand. AAAHHHH.....This shit burns..It is acid..My hand feels so dead. It feels like it has been cut off. Augh! Shit, this guy just punched me in my face. He is getting ready to throw the second punch. I need to close my eyes...
5 Minutes Later
My face feels messed up. I can feel the blood dripping on my pants from my face. Not done yet! Something is stinging me in my back. One of the goon is taking something out of my back...Knife..Bastard, stabbed me. He is going for it the second time..So, much for being a superhero!
10 Minutes Later
Flies have started walking on my back. I can feel my sliced skin getting sucked on by the flies. I turn my eyes towards the front. A gun pointing at my face. It is over. This is where he shoots. This is where I die. After one minute, a bullet is going to hit my face point blank, and the pieces of my face are going to be scattered on the floor. And, my body will be lying in a gutter. My heartbeat is going faster again. Experiencing a gun on your head, and facing death right in the barrel are two different cases. I should just close my eyes and say my last prayers. I hear the trigger being clicked. I heard it, the sound of my death approaching towards me....AAAHHHH...My shoulder...The bullet just hit my shoulder.
"I heard something. Go check the door. Maybe it is Police...Lets go."
I am alone, with the pain increasing minute by minute. The ropes they tied me with have become loose. I am trying to break free. I think I got it. Freedom. I am making my way out of the back door. I am running, as fast as I can. I can only hear one thing...My footsteps. My breath is becoming heavy. Can't run anymore. I am on the highway. The bullet is still in my shoulder! It feels like the fire from Hell. The poision is going to start making way through my body. Need to do something fast! I have my knife. It is surely going to hurt at first. AH! The knife is in, and now I take it out. The bullet falls on the road. Blood is dripping on the road, from my shoulder to the road. I am taking my shirt off. Covering my shoulder. Shirt is getting painted red. Need to go home.
12:00 P.M.
Midnight
It is Thurday. I am on the roof. Staring at the lonely night. I have done my dressing. Now, I understand the true meaning of life. There was a moment... when I used to blame everything and everyone... for all the pain and suffering and vile things that happened to me, that I saw happen to my people. Used to blame everybody. Blamed white people, blamed society, blamed God. I didn't get no answers 'cause I was asking the wrong questions. You have to ask the right questions. And the question is, 'When will the system be cured?' When will the crime rate decrease? When will people quit their selfishness? Corrupt Hain Saale Sab Ke Sab.
Now, I am seeing the true sunset. I have emailed, Police the whereabouts of, A.J. I do not want my picture on the front page, neither do I want any rewards. Because I know, I have done nothing. I am not a superhero. I have found out who am I.
I am jumping off my roof. My body is going to hit the ground and it is going to be all over. The, corruption is not that easy to change. Everybody is involved in it. It attacks your brain, but your heart is still there. Think through your heart..Breath through your heart. Like this wind, which is carrying me softly towards the ground. Feels like I am lying on my bed. But, this bed is a doorway towards the clouds. I found out who I am. I just have one last word.
"Superman."
Showing posts with label Emotions. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Emotions. Show all posts
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
Tears Of A Clown
'Here's one more, I was attending a conference and somebody brings up Bush's name. I stand up, throw my shoes to the side and scream, 'Bush Twin'd Us!'....'
There were barely any spectators present in the auditorium. The once full, 'Clown Princes' Comedy House which gave world countless comedians was now witnessing empty seats. It seemed like they were going to shut down any day. Probably, they were just waiting for the right hour. Most of the workers had already quit their jobs and the only person apart from janitor who seemed to be doing any work was the, Stand - Up Comedian, 'Daniel 'Joker' Blanchett'.
Daniel - Get it! I am pointing at the conspiracy involving Bush's name thrown in the 9/11 attacks...This is Black Comedy at its best.
Timothy - I think, I've heard that one before.
Daniel - Come on Timmy...I am performing here.
Timothy - The House is empty Joker Boy! The, only claps you are going to get are from me or Ed The Janitor when he shows up for his shift.
Daniel - Never thought that I would be the last person to hear the sound of silence in this place.
Timothy - What sound?....What silence?....What are you talking about here?....The, only sound I ever heard in this place was manical laughter from every corner. Heck, the people laughed so loud that I had to put the material they use in garage doors in my windows. That sound and the sound of my pocket getting full of money. Look, at my pockets now. What do you see?...What do you hear?...They are empty, full of air. The windows are broken. Those seats are getting covered with dirt....Even, Ed was asking for better cleaning sprays. And, what should I pay him with? With your mindless humor!...Huh, Humor me Joker Boy. This place has fell apart and I want one last laugh. I will get that laugh when you walk out of that door. The door is not hard to find. Says, EXIT...And, it is capitalised.
Daniel - I have been performing on this stage for months, Tim. I filled the seats with crowd. Suddenly, the laughter faded away. I kept standing on the empty stage with the curtain closing on me. After, the curtain had closed all I could hear was the janitor's broom, sweeping on the floor, back and forth. The toughest thing in the world is to crack a joke and expect people to laugh. Because, if they don't the joke is on you.
Timothy - The joke has hit you! You are fired. Get out and never show me your face again because if you do your body will be lying on the floor and I will place it on the stage. Now, that will get you enough laughs and claps.
The curtain had closed.
'Danny, where have you been? You are overdue!'
Daniel - Ed, I am currently facing a financial crisis. I promise....
Ed - No promises, man. I have been hearing about this crisis for 8 months. You either pay now or leave my apartment.
Daniel's footsteps paved their way into the raining field.
Daniel - Oh, Thank You God! All, I needed was pathetic fallacy. Atleast, I still have Katherine.
The rain was starting to increase. The clouds had blocked moon's light. But, Daniel was still carrying a smile.
Katherine - Our, relationship is over. The ice broke a long time ago. And, what have you done for me? Forget about gifts, I have been paying your debt for like forever. And, don't try to call me or I will stab your heart with an icepick. Go and get a life.
The door slammed on Daniel's face.
Daniel - You shouldn't say those things Katy....I am a Pisces...And we are really sensitive.
'If, I had a tumor I would name it, 'Katherine'! I feel like King Lear now. And, I feel hungry....'
Daniel had found refuge with some beggars in an alley.
'Hey, buddy...Do you have a lighter?'
Daniel - Yes, I also have a broken heart and an empty stomach. Here!
Smoke from the ciggarette was hard to see in the darkness.
'Are you a clown?'
Daniel - Since the day I was born.
'Yo, Tom, Freddy, we got Hobbo The Clown over here. Gather up.'
The beggars gathered around Daniel, waiting for his next move. Waiting, to chuckle up. It seemed like the clown was having a bad day. He didnt talk.
Tom - Is he supposed to be, Monalisa?
Freddy - Where's the red nose?
Tom - Let's give him one!
For a moment there, Daniel didn't know what hit him. His eyes had already closed. Droplets of blood from his face were mixing with the puddles in the alley. And, there was his body lying in the alley.
'If you wake up at a different place, can you wake up as a completely different person? Bloodstains on my shirt are the least of my worries. My starved stomach is telling a whole different tale right now. Here, I stand in the street getting full of people. Where, no one cares about no one. They all walk. Some stare at me, disgusted by what I look like. Look, inside the deepest corners of your heart and you will find a cage with a monster locked inside. Tame that monster because once it becomes unleashed places will look shrunk enough to hide. If, I don't find food soon I will die and that monster will be unleashed. That, worries me.'
Daniel's hands were digging through the trash cans. His, eyes wondering through the garbage for food. Mouth was starting to water. Brain was drawing images for food in the mind. The temptation was making every thing worse. He picked up the garbage bin and threw it with full force towards the ground. The anger inside started to come out with the stomping on the piece of metal.
'I keep talking to myself. Thinking that this would calm my hunger. All, my eyes see are the people constantly chewing on food. They are everywhere. Like, zombies....Walking and chewing....Get hold of yourself Danny....Insanity is starting to take control of me...I need food...'
Sun was at its highest. Temperature was increasing. And, there stood Danny holding a sign that read, 'WILL GET BEATEN FOR FOOD!!'. Things, hunger can make a person do.
Daniel - Sir, would you like to beat me up. I am a human punching bag. Take your anger out on me. Make me taste my own blood. If you buy a punching bag, it will cost you a lot. But, you will never get the feeling of a real punching bag.
'How much?'
A smile started to merge on his face. The man took of his coat. And, pain started to come in.
Daniel - This is the best coffee I have ever had and I have had some good ones. Not a bad job really. Just have to remember to faint after 5 minutes or I will break some bones. Surgery is expensive.
It's has just been reported that the professional comedian, 'Hit - Mo' has been found dead in his mansion.....
Daniel - Turn Up...Turn the volume up!
'Our reporters are live on the scene. Apparently the famous comedian hanged himself. Police are not letting anyone inside. The only information we were able to get is that he wrote a quote on his walls saying, 'Comedy Is Dead'. We will keep you informed as we gain further information.'
'A comedian died today. These people will talk for a while and shut up.......I am Jack's Silenced Laughter...I talk without speaking and hear without listening. His death will bring thousands of fans and supporters on his funeral. Roads will fill up the cemetary. Coffin will be brought. He will be buried. Tears will be shed. Speeches will be made. And, he will become a legend. What happens when I leave? Nobody cares...Aprt from a few people nobody knows me and they don't try to know me. They don't look beyond the mask that I wear. They never gave me the recognition. I never got what I deserved. Even after his death he will be standing out in the cemetary. But, I am like a chameleon. You expect me to blend in. Well, I simply can't. I don't blend with people with thousand masks. The fame that I should always walk with, despises me.......I am Jack's smirking revenge!....All what you have done is simply not enough. They want more. More till you burst like a bubble. The clown antiques, the reused jokes, the stereotypical humor, is outdated. You give them dialouges. They want themes. And you take the singing dancing crap of the world. Well, I am putting an end to this. I respect the love my fans have given me. So, when I walk out there the curtain is going to remain open. It is going to close when the smirk is gone from my face. And you know what, my monster has come out of its cage..............'
The silence followed, unitl a voice broke it.
Timothy - I have deep concerns about you, Danny Boy. But, I am helpless...I respect your thoughts on everything you just said...I really do...But, I have sold this place.
Daniel - Fear is starting to take ahold of you. What are you afraid of? The gun...Huh...Is the gun intimidating you? I had to give, Katherine a visit. She was angry at first, but I made her mood better. After, I left she didn't say anything. Didn't utter one single word. She remained there, lying motionless. The gun is her courtesy. And my payment is yours.
Timothy - There is no money.....
Daniel - Look, you give me the money and I walk out of here. And maybe just shoot you in the leg. Don't give me the money, well then my gun wants to laugh out loud with a bang.
Timothy ran for the bathroom. His hands locked the door and his cell phone made its way out of the pocket towards his ear.
Daniel - Oh, Fat Boy.....You have made this whole thing worse than it already was. Come out and I won't torture you to death.
Timothy - Police Station. I have got a mad man in my office.....He is trying to kill me. He has got a gun. I have locked myself in my bathroom. Yes, I will stay here. Come quick.
The Police Cars made their way out of the traffic. Sirens were still screaming. They surrounded the whole place. Daniel was unaware of the Police who were behind the door of Timothy's office.
'Freeze. Put down your weapon and step away from the door with hands behind your back.'
The gun hit the floor. Timothy opened his door and came out.
'Sir, there are no bullets in the gun!'
'What did you do? Did you kill anyone?'
Timothy - He killed his girlfriend.
Katherine's voice reached, Police's ears.
Daniel - I Am Jack's Maniacal Wits.
Daniel's laughter filled the whole room. His laughter has still not faded away. Daniel sits in a mental asylum with smirk across his face laughing silently.
'The toughest job in the world is to crack a joke and expect people to laugh. Because if they don't, the joke is on you!'
There were barely any spectators present in the auditorium. The once full, 'Clown Princes' Comedy House which gave world countless comedians was now witnessing empty seats. It seemed like they were going to shut down any day. Probably, they were just waiting for the right hour. Most of the workers had already quit their jobs and the only person apart from janitor who seemed to be doing any work was the, Stand - Up Comedian, 'Daniel 'Joker' Blanchett'.
Daniel - Get it! I am pointing at the conspiracy involving Bush's name thrown in the 9/11 attacks...This is Black Comedy at its best.
Timothy - I think, I've heard that one before.
Daniel - Come on Timmy...I am performing here.
Timothy - The House is empty Joker Boy! The, only claps you are going to get are from me or Ed The Janitor when he shows up for his shift.
Daniel - Never thought that I would be the last person to hear the sound of silence in this place.
Timothy - What sound?....What silence?....What are you talking about here?....The, only sound I ever heard in this place was manical laughter from every corner. Heck, the people laughed so loud that I had to put the material they use in garage doors in my windows. That sound and the sound of my pocket getting full of money. Look, at my pockets now. What do you see?...What do you hear?...They are empty, full of air. The windows are broken. Those seats are getting covered with dirt....Even, Ed was asking for better cleaning sprays. And, what should I pay him with? With your mindless humor!...Huh, Humor me Joker Boy. This place has fell apart and I want one last laugh. I will get that laugh when you walk out of that door. The door is not hard to find. Says, EXIT...And, it is capitalised.
Daniel - I have been performing on this stage for months, Tim. I filled the seats with crowd. Suddenly, the laughter faded away. I kept standing on the empty stage with the curtain closing on me. After, the curtain had closed all I could hear was the janitor's broom, sweeping on the floor, back and forth. The toughest thing in the world is to crack a joke and expect people to laugh. Because, if they don't the joke is on you.
Timothy - The joke has hit you! You are fired. Get out and never show me your face again because if you do your body will be lying on the floor and I will place it on the stage. Now, that will get you enough laughs and claps.
The curtain had closed.
'Danny, where have you been? You are overdue!'
Daniel - Ed, I am currently facing a financial crisis. I promise....
Ed - No promises, man. I have been hearing about this crisis for 8 months. You either pay now or leave my apartment.
Daniel's footsteps paved their way into the raining field.
Daniel - Oh, Thank You God! All, I needed was pathetic fallacy. Atleast, I still have Katherine.
The rain was starting to increase. The clouds had blocked moon's light. But, Daniel was still carrying a smile.
Katherine - Our, relationship is over. The ice broke a long time ago. And, what have you done for me? Forget about gifts, I have been paying your debt for like forever. And, don't try to call me or I will stab your heart with an icepick. Go and get a life.
The door slammed on Daniel's face.
Daniel - You shouldn't say those things Katy....I am a Pisces...And we are really sensitive.
'If, I had a tumor I would name it, 'Katherine'! I feel like King Lear now. And, I feel hungry....'
Daniel had found refuge with some beggars in an alley.
'Hey, buddy...Do you have a lighter?'
Daniel - Yes, I also have a broken heart and an empty stomach. Here!
Smoke from the ciggarette was hard to see in the darkness.
'Are you a clown?'
Daniel - Since the day I was born.
'Yo, Tom, Freddy, we got Hobbo The Clown over here. Gather up.'
The beggars gathered around Daniel, waiting for his next move. Waiting, to chuckle up. It seemed like the clown was having a bad day. He didnt talk.
Tom - Is he supposed to be, Monalisa?
Freddy - Where's the red nose?
Tom - Let's give him one!
For a moment there, Daniel didn't know what hit him. His eyes had already closed. Droplets of blood from his face were mixing with the puddles in the alley. And, there was his body lying in the alley.
'If you wake up at a different place, can you wake up as a completely different person? Bloodstains on my shirt are the least of my worries. My starved stomach is telling a whole different tale right now. Here, I stand in the street getting full of people. Where, no one cares about no one. They all walk. Some stare at me, disgusted by what I look like. Look, inside the deepest corners of your heart and you will find a cage with a monster locked inside. Tame that monster because once it becomes unleashed places will look shrunk enough to hide. If, I don't find food soon I will die and that monster will be unleashed. That, worries me.'
Daniel's hands were digging through the trash cans. His, eyes wondering through the garbage for food. Mouth was starting to water. Brain was drawing images for food in the mind. The temptation was making every thing worse. He picked up the garbage bin and threw it with full force towards the ground. The anger inside started to come out with the stomping on the piece of metal.
'I keep talking to myself. Thinking that this would calm my hunger. All, my eyes see are the people constantly chewing on food. They are everywhere. Like, zombies....Walking and chewing....Get hold of yourself Danny....Insanity is starting to take control of me...I need food...'
Sun was at its highest. Temperature was increasing. And, there stood Danny holding a sign that read, 'WILL GET BEATEN FOR FOOD!!'. Things, hunger can make a person do.
Daniel - Sir, would you like to beat me up. I am a human punching bag. Take your anger out on me. Make me taste my own blood. If you buy a punching bag, it will cost you a lot. But, you will never get the feeling of a real punching bag.
'How much?'
A smile started to merge on his face. The man took of his coat. And, pain started to come in.
Daniel - This is the best coffee I have ever had and I have had some good ones. Not a bad job really. Just have to remember to faint after 5 minutes or I will break some bones. Surgery is expensive.
It's has just been reported that the professional comedian, 'Hit - Mo' has been found dead in his mansion.....
Daniel - Turn Up...Turn the volume up!
'Our reporters are live on the scene. Apparently the famous comedian hanged himself. Police are not letting anyone inside. The only information we were able to get is that he wrote a quote on his walls saying, 'Comedy Is Dead'. We will keep you informed as we gain further information.'
'A comedian died today. These people will talk for a while and shut up.......I am Jack's Silenced Laughter...I talk without speaking and hear without listening. His death will bring thousands of fans and supporters on his funeral. Roads will fill up the cemetary. Coffin will be brought. He will be buried. Tears will be shed. Speeches will be made. And, he will become a legend. What happens when I leave? Nobody cares...Aprt from a few people nobody knows me and they don't try to know me. They don't look beyond the mask that I wear. They never gave me the recognition. I never got what I deserved. Even after his death he will be standing out in the cemetary. But, I am like a chameleon. You expect me to blend in. Well, I simply can't. I don't blend with people with thousand masks. The fame that I should always walk with, despises me.......I am Jack's smirking revenge!....All what you have done is simply not enough. They want more. More till you burst like a bubble. The clown antiques, the reused jokes, the stereotypical humor, is outdated. You give them dialouges. They want themes. And you take the singing dancing crap of the world. Well, I am putting an end to this. I respect the love my fans have given me. So, when I walk out there the curtain is going to remain open. It is going to close when the smirk is gone from my face. And you know what, my monster has come out of its cage..............'
The silence followed, unitl a voice broke it.
Timothy - I have deep concerns about you, Danny Boy. But, I am helpless...I respect your thoughts on everything you just said...I really do...But, I have sold this place.
Daniel - Fear is starting to take ahold of you. What are you afraid of? The gun...Huh...Is the gun intimidating you? I had to give, Katherine a visit. She was angry at first, but I made her mood better. After, I left she didn't say anything. Didn't utter one single word. She remained there, lying motionless. The gun is her courtesy. And my payment is yours.
Timothy - There is no money.....
Daniel - Look, you give me the money and I walk out of here. And maybe just shoot you in the leg. Don't give me the money, well then my gun wants to laugh out loud with a bang.
Timothy ran for the bathroom. His hands locked the door and his cell phone made its way out of the pocket towards his ear.
Daniel - Oh, Fat Boy.....You have made this whole thing worse than it already was. Come out and I won't torture you to death.
Timothy - Police Station. I have got a mad man in my office.....He is trying to kill me. He has got a gun. I have locked myself in my bathroom. Yes, I will stay here. Come quick.
The Police Cars made their way out of the traffic. Sirens were still screaming. They surrounded the whole place. Daniel was unaware of the Police who were behind the door of Timothy's office.
'Freeze. Put down your weapon and step away from the door with hands behind your back.'
The gun hit the floor. Timothy opened his door and came out.
'Sir, there are no bullets in the gun!'
'What did you do? Did you kill anyone?'
Timothy - He killed his girlfriend.
Katherine's voice reached, Police's ears.
Daniel - I Am Jack's Maniacal Wits.
Daniel's laughter filled the whole room. His laughter has still not faded away. Daniel sits in a mental asylum with smirk across his face laughing silently.
'The toughest job in the world is to crack a joke and expect people to laugh. Because if they don't, the joke is on you!'
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